Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
