on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
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