I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
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