No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Randomize
