NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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