just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I love having hate sex.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
