And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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