No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Im part way to drunk.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
