yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
