I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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