PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just want to make out with him forever
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
