Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Randomize
