Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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