So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
you win again, gameday.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize