the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
