if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
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