how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
