no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
