My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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