Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
