it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
