I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
