It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
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