Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
