i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize