fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Randomize
