absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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