his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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