I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
