This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize