She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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