So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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