No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Randomize
