matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
