Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Randomize
