i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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