i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
