i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
