Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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