her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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