If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
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He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
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So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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