I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
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