I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
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