Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
