I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize