so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Let's get the cat blown out
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
