Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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