ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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