So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
