help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm sobbing to NWA
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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