By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
