any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
